Not that motherhood isn't work in almost every sense of the word. I mean the go-to-a-job-outside-the-home-full-time kind of work.
But teaching flute lessons twice a week has made me feel a lot like a working mother. And our family's weekly schedule never seems to leave a night open to just be a family.
Monday nights I teach from right after school until bedtime. I have a half-hour commute, so that adds an extra hour that I'm away. And Family Home Evening has to be moved.
Wednesday nights I teach the same hours, leaving home 10 minutes before Mierae gets home from school, and returning home at bedtime, only keeping myself from the kids longer once I arrive home because of dinner to eat and milk to pump. I hate that I see Mierae for mere minutes on these days. It makes me feel like I've been missing the whole year she's been 5.
This week on Tuesday Eric doesn't have a leadership meeting for Church or a council meeting for Jolie's preschool, so he told me he volunteered to load the truck at the Church's storehouse for food to be delivered to needy families. Now if anyone knows anything about Eric, they'll know that this kind, big-hearted man is the first to volunteer to do anything, whether it's to say the closing prayer in Sunday School, bring snacks to choir practice, or clean the toilets at the Church on a Saturday night. He even volunteered to baby-sit at a Relief Society activity when I wasn't even going to be there. I admire this about him so much. But I also get jealous sometimes of the time others get with him that I don't.
Thursday night this week is my scheduled night to go to the temple. It's too hard to try to find a baby-sitter for the kids every month so we could go to the temple together, so we take turns two nights a month going separately.
Friday and Saturday we try to either go on a date ourselves, or watch someone else's kids so they can go on a date. Even though continued courtship is essential to a strong marriage, it still means that we aren't together as a family those nights.
Saturday mornings Eric tries to work to make up for the time he's home while I'm teaching. And Sundays he has meetings while I get myself and the kids ready for Church alone.
All of the things we do are important and good. We just aren't together as a family as much as I had hoped. It's hard to have to juggle nights to make sure we have Family Home Evening, and it's our least favorite thing to have to put the kids to bed alone. But there is always the good to focus on.
Mondays and Wednesdays Mierae comes home from school to her Dad, not a baby-sitter, not to some other place. Not many kids get that kind of time with their Dads. And I get to be home the other three days of the week.
Eric's service at the storehouse will bless many lives, including ours. He has the faith that if we are doing the Lord's work, He will give us blessings. That principle holds true for our temple attendance too. Sacrifice and obedience are rewarded with blessings.
Eric and I love and need the time to go on dates often. We are grateful to have good friends close by who will swap baby-sitting with us. There aren't any date-night plans for our weekend yet, so we may switch my temple night and have a big family celebration for St. Patrick's Day, complete with corned beef and cabbage, and golden chocolate coins at the end of a cupcake rainbow.
Saturday afternoons are usually open for Eric to take the girls swimming or to work together as a family to clean the house. I love the opportunities I have to teach my kids as I work alongside them.
Mierae told us this week one of her favorite nights was when we had Friday night movie night. Eric and I watched "How to Train Your Dragon" on his laptop in the kitchen, and the girls watched a princess sing-along movie in the living room. It didn't necessarily matter that we were watching different shows. It was special because we were all home together.
We're trying to make the time we have together as special and as fun as we can. It's always comforting to know we still have an eternity to be together.
4 comments:
I just loved reading this post. It gave me motivation to be better and to prioritize my life better. You guys are such wonderful parents and such great examples to your children. They sure are lucky to have you!!
Wow, I didn't know you taught so many flute lessons, that's quite a bit of time! That's great that you have a little extra income though, and great that Eric can be home to take care of the kids.
That's amazing that you teach so many students! How cool! Life does tend to take over, though, doesn't it? One of the difficulties. You're doing great though! :) Love you!!
We don't have much family time either. I need to be better about making use of the time that we do get to spend together though. I don't know how you can teach for so long twice a week! I think I would go a little crazy! Good for you for all you get done though! I'm amazed! Maybe someday I can be as cool as you. :)
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